I was very well-behaved at school. It wasn't that I always agreed with the reasons for complying, conforming, or doing a particular thing I was asked; I simply found the idea of being told off or criticised in front of others too stressful to contemplate. I drew far too much attention to myself as it … Continue reading Logic, behaviour, and discipline
Does anybody else ever find themselves playing this game? I'm always on the lookout. My daughter loves going to our local museum. For a while we went every weekend: always the same routine of bus–café–museum–park–ice cream (summer only)–bus. Now that my girl is at school, our weekends are more varied. There's often a birthday party … Continue reading Spot the Autistic
In the early days of this blog – just one day, in fact, before I was assessed for, and received, my official diagnosis – I wrote a post about how I considered myself to be not an introvert but an "autistic extrovert". I now realise that I was mistaken. I've been meaning to write about … Continue reading So it turns out that I was never an extrovert after all…
This morning, I walked to work, as usual. The weather, the subject of so much small talk on the at times beautiful but still beleaguered isle I call home, was sleety. Wet. Grey. Cold-but-not-that-cold. And yet, on cars, gardens, and rooftops, there were the still remnants of a light coverage of real snow from the night before. And the … Continue reading Can you ever tell?
As I wrote in another post a while back, sometimes it hits me. And this morning it really, really hit me. And I did something I've never done before. Since my official diagnosis, exactly two months ago today, I've been – as usual – in numerous situations at work where I've been required to 'network'. … Continue reading A line has been crossed.
It was only very recently that it occurred to me: I rarely look people directly in the eyes. Coming from a 36-year-old autistic person, that probably sounds preposterous. Autistic people are known for not making eye contact, aren't we? And surely I'd have noticed such a major behavioural trait in myself? I mean, yes, my … Continue reading Why I “can’t possibly be Autistic”, Reason #2: eye to eye?
[Trigger warning: mental illness] To everyone who has ever known me, Recently, I've discovered something about myself. And what I'd long wondered about, and convinced myself of, was officially confirmed for me. I am autistic. To some, it will come as no surprise at all. Others may not have seen this coming. And to others … Continue reading An open letter to everyone who has ever known me.
[Edit: at the time when I wrote this post, I mistakenly thought of myself as an extrovert. I was incorrect in this assessment of myself – as I explain here. This is a big, long, journey of self-discovery, readers! However, in all other respects, the words I present below are as true as they ever … Continue reading Information, social communication, and empathy – let’s look at a little closer…
[Edit: since writing this post, I have come to the realisation that I was wrong in my assessment of myself as an "extrovert", having misunderstood the definitions. However, I leave this post here as is – I'm still going through the process of learning about who I am, post-formal diagnosis, and this was me back … Continue reading The Atypical Introvert?
My husband doesn't share my enthusiasm for social media. That's fine; there are many people who see it all as vain, vacuous, narcissistic, soul-sapping nonsense. And certainly, there is much of it that is. But my husband's chief objection to it is that he can't fathom people's need for constant validation. People have always needed validation. … Continue reading Validation